What My Body Taught Me About Goal Setting

A few days ago, I could barely get through the first act of The Nutcracker without wincing.

Holiday performance season with the Cincinnati Symphony is no joke: pops concerts, double performances, rehearsals, long days, and the kind of physical exhaustion musicians know all too well. Somewhere in the middle of all of it, my body started sending louder signals — tightness, weakness in my hands, nerve pain, fatigue.

But I kept going.

I stretched. I iced. I took ibuprofen. I told myself all the encouraging things:

“You’ve got this.”
“Just breathe.”
“Push through.”

And eventually, my body answered back with a very clear “no.”

The irony wasn’t lost on me.

I had just spent months building frameworks around purposeful planning and aligned goals. I love goals. I love vision. I love clarity.

But sitting there after one performance, I realized something important:

Your body has to believe what your mind is saying.

We spend so much time focused on outcomes:

• Win the audition
• Book the gig
• Land the opportunity
• Perform perfectly
• Achieve more

But research continues to show that process goals have a much greater impact on long-term success than outcome goals alone.

And honestly? I felt that disconnect physically.

My mind was focused on “getting through the season,” but my body wasn’t aligned with the actions needed to support that goal. I wanted the outcome without fully honoring the process.

That disconnect eventually caught up with me.

So as we move into a new season of reflection and goal setting, here’s something worth asking:

What if your goals felt aligned not only mentally, but physically too?

A Simple Alignment Exercise

Think of a goal you're working toward right now.
Maybe it's an audition, a project launch, a performance coming up.

1. Visualize it fully. Build a rich idea of it. What does it look like and feel like? Yes, this is on the "outcome" side, but really get observant about the details.
2. Name the goal. Notice your self-talk. What are you telling yourself about this goal? Write it down exactly as it sounds in your head, no editing.
3. Now check in with your body. How does the goal feel? Say that goal out loud—actually speak it. Notice: do you expand or contract? does your breathing deepen or get shallow? do your shoulders rise toward your ears or settle down your back?

Do you feel in sync? Or is there conflict?

4. Shift the goal post if needed. Leave behind the "should"s. What changes?
5. When you've got a goal that feels true, write it down. Now you'll focus on the process actions. If your outcome is "book ten gigs this spring", name the process "reach out to three presenters this week with genuine curiosity about their season". Say that one out loud. Notice your body again.

Different, right?

What I’m learning is this:

Alignment isn’t just a mindset. It’s physical.

Your breathing, posture, tension, and nervous system often reveal the truth before your thoughts do.

Here’s what my body has been teaching me lately:

→ Process goals often create expansion. Outcome goals often create contraction.
→ Positive self-talk only works when your body actually believes it.
→ Consistent daily actions matter more than forcing heroic moments.
→ Alignment is something you can physically feel when you’re paying attention.

My arm is healing now — slowly, honestly, the way healing usually works when you finally stop ignoring the signals.

And this holiday season, I’m approaching things differently.

Less interested in pushing harder.
More interested in listening better.

Because maybe success isn’t about overriding ourselves to achieve the outcome.

Maybe it’s about creating goals that allow our mind, body, and spirit to move together.

The holidays ask a lot from us — to show up, perform, produce, deliver.

But maybe the most aligned thing you can do right now is rest when you need rest. Pause when you need pause. Tell yourself the truth instead of forcing yourself through exhaustion.

That’s my wish for you this season:

Not more productivity.
Not perfect execution.
Just the courage to stay aligned with what’s real.

Happy holidays.

-Ixi

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• training modules and ongoing resources

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