Searching for Validation (on Google)


By: Tiffany 

The other day I was preparing for a big meeting.

I had invited a group of other digital marketers working for university performing arts presenters to a think tank of sorts where we could share ideas and support each other's efforts.

However, I had chosen to lead this endeavor, and I was feeling the pressure.

Doubts started to surface.

Why are you doing this Tiffany? Who are you to do this?

And then, I started to Google.

"How to lead a think tank."

There weren't a ton of great results so I texted my husband and was like, what's another word for think tank, so I could search that too.

😖 What in the hell was I doing?!

Thankfully I was in the middle of reading a book by Tara Mohr called Playing Big, recommended to me by Elizabeth Rowe. (Highly, highly recommend you read it, too.)

There was a section about how (women especially) tend to not trust themselves or their ideas.

Conditioning encourages us to go outward to find the answers, when in reality, so often the answer can be found by going inward.

I started this think tank for a specific reason.

I knew exactly what I wanted to share with those folks, but I was not trusting it at all. Someone else must know better... I was searching for validation, and of course I was searching for it on Google.

But what I needed to do was sit there for a second and ask MYSELF how I wanted to lead this meeting.

And within a few minutes, it became clear.

My agenda started to practically write itself, and I felt so happy and relieved.

But that's not the point of this story.

The point is to encourage you to go inward, too.

To trust YOURSELF.

This manifests in all areas of our lives...

  • Are you trusting your musical choices?
  • Are you trusting what career YOU want to pursue, not what your teacher thinks is success?
  • Are you trusting what kind of rest you need, not what the latest New York Times article says?

Yes, sometimes we need external advice and we need to seek help. Those things can be life changing.

But what if we resisted the impulse for external validation a little more often?

So this week, we have a challenge for you:

When you're struggling with a decision or second guessing yourself, truly go inward. You may be surprised what you find there.



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